I consider myself a near pro at Pinterest projects. When I was prepping to tackle my newest blog topic on “DIY Christmas Garlands :: So Easy a Kid Could Do It”, I knew I was more than adequately prepared. Well, all I am now prepared for is being on Santa’s naughty list after yelling profanity, an extra heavy pour of wine, and a quick trip to my local craft store to replace my own Christmas Pinterest fails. Bah Humbug!
Originally, I was going to show you beautiful pictures of DIY kid craft garlands that my 7-year old executed flawlessly. We were going to focus on the following five garlands in particular: pom-pom, marshmallow, construction paper, burlap, and popcorn/cranberry. It would have been each five listed followed by three easy directions to follow and a gorgeous finished photo. Well, all I want for Christmas is my sanity back. Here is my alternate version of why sometimes it’s okay to fail at your ambitious Pinterest projects and embrace the Christmas chaos.
Naturally, the second I realized these DIY garlands were not exactly kid-friendly was the moment my daughter decided she HAD to try all of them. The idea of alternating the use of a needle, hot glue gun, and stapler filled my daughter with Christmas joy. Seriously, four of the five garlands required a large sewing needle. My child reenacts The Exorcist possession scene for the flu shot, so the fact that she was now pricking her finger almost voluntarily to prove a point still baffles me. The 5th garland (construction paper) does not require a needle and can be done with glue or tape, but a staple gun works best for that one as well. Therefore, the not kid-friendly aspect of these festive fun projects turned this into a Christmas Pinterest fail on my sanity.
On the flip side, my Australian Shepherds thought these garlands were the greatest idea ever. Specifically, the marshmallow and popcorn/cranberry garlands. Edible garland seemed fun to me at first. We could snack, sip cocoa, and listen to the Disney Christmas playlist on Pandora while stringing them together. I even have a vintage popcorn machine I placed at the bottom of our spiral staircase to decorate with our DIY popcorn garland. Our first Aussie, Cruz, took care of the entire bag of popcorn while we were distracted with a different disaster so that all we had remaining was our snack bowl and a bag of cranberries.
The reason for our original distraction belongs to our Toy Aussie, Alkami. I was inspired last year at Nebraska Furniture Mart when I first saw their marshmallow garland around their trees. I made a mental note and planned to make them myself in 2020. With that in mind, I placed a rustic-themed Christmas tree in the game room upstairs for our DIY marshmallow garland.
Well, Alkami thought this was the best day ever. She ate the marshmallow garland (twine and all) while simultaneously pulling other ornaments off of the tree. Those ornaments came in a box labeled “shatter-proof”. When they fall through the balcony balusters onto the hardwood living room floor below, shatter doesn’t even become a good enough explanation. More like, an explosion of epic proportions…on repeat. I won’t even get into the dog monitoring and clean up of “little treasures” that followed their snack tasting escapade. Both dogs have grooming appointments scheduled this week.
O.C.D. ~ Obsessive Christmas Disorder
I have a shirt labeled O.C.D. ~ Obsessive Christmas Disorder because it is true. I have numerous Christmas trees throughout the house, the stockings are truly hung from the chimney with care, and the idea of crafts all over my kitchen table stressed me out prior to beginning, so perhaps the writing was on the wall for our DIY garlands. However, we previously made the “Dollar Tree Wreath” that turned out fantastic as did our “Pumpkin Floral Centerpiece”. Unfortunately, our handmade Christmas Pinterest kid craft garlands were replaced by pre-made garlands at Hobby Lobby and Michaels. Despite this process, I’m still following the advice of “you better not pout, I’m telling you why”. We had so many giggles and even better stories to tell as a result of our failed attempts.
“Christmas isn’t a season. It’s a feeling.” ~Edna Ferber