What I Wish I Knew About Infertility


A pregnancy test and pills and shots.

Did you know 19 percent of women are unable to get pregnant within a year of trying?

I fall well within that category. We struggled for several years before consulting an infertility specialist.

I did the research, I talked to friends that also struggled, I joined the message boards and the infertility groups. I needed answers and info. Even with all the info, there were still things I wish I had known. It’s a lonely time, so I hope these things will help someone else not feel as alone and to be better prepared.

It Feels Like Eternity 

“I felt like a failure every month.” A friend of mine told me that, and it’s so true. Every month it chips away at you. Every cycle that results in just a single line on the stick breaks your heart a little more.

>> RELATED READ :: Let’s Talk About Infertility <<

Be Flexible

You have to be super flexible. This timeline is not your own. There are so many appointments. You can’t go out of town or really plan anything. You have to be ready and available at all times.

I went to the doctor three times the last week, and each time my follicles were still not big enough. Once the follicles were big enough, I had to take a trigger shot and come back the next day.

Insurance Woes

Insurance rarely covers any of it. In fact, insurance covered none of our treatment. However, it covered the shot portion for a friend of mine.

It depends on your insurance, but you definitely want to be prepared to pay out of pocket. And it ranges from $1,500 to upwards of $6,000!

A pregnancy test with a big question mark next to it.You Have Options

There are several options. You don’t have to jump right into IVF (in vitro fertilization). There are “starter” medications that can work immediately or you could fall somewhere in between.

For example, we took Clomid for several months, but it didn’t work for us. We stayed the course and ended with IUI (intrauterine insemination).

You could also go through a simple tubal procedure, and that may be all you need.

>> RELATED READ :: How to Support Someone Struggling with Infertility <<

Emotional Overload

All of the shots and medications increase your hormones — big time. You will feel weepy and sad and angry and a little crazy sometimes. The hormones can simulate what a pregnancy would feel like at the beginning, such as bloating, nausea, mood swings, and exhaustion. It’s all part of the meds you are putting into your body.

It’s a really hard time. You feel alone and like the days are creeping by. The two-week wait is the longest two weeks of your life. (I suggest doing anything and everything that keeps your mind busy, whether that’s reading, a vacation, cooking, or another hobby.)

Infertility is not something a lot of people talk about or even share. I’m quite the opposite and love to talk about it. I hope I can reach that one person who is feeling so alone in her journey and help her feel a little bit better. I would love if you added your perspective as well. Hopefully it reaches those who need it the most!

Previous article10 Must-Packs for Your Next Vacation Rental
Next articleGames to Grow Executive Functioning Skills in Children {VIDEO INCLUDED}
Jennifer Sanders
Jen was born and raised in the DFW metroplex. She now lives in Rockwall on a family "compound" with her husband and nine-year-old daughter (nine going on 18!). Her parents and brother's family live on the same patch of land. They have had cows and chickens (and dogs, cats, hamsters, and fish). Jen graduated from Texas A&M Commerce with her master's in counseling and almost finished her doctorate in educational leadership. She has worked at a school counselor for all levels and in the special education world. She now works from home with an online school in the state testing department—it's the best of both worlds! When she's not driving her daughter to all-star cheer, sideline cheer, or Girl Scouts, she's saying YES! to something. There's not much spare time left, but she likes to spend it cooking, buying crafting supplies, planning things months in advance, reading, coaching her daughter's sideline team, serving on the PTA, listening to Christmas music year-round, and Starbucks.


  1. Great article and another female issue that’s hardly discussed… gets lost in all the celebrations. I wish it was something covered at anju check-ups. I think there’s a lot of shame and isolation felt.

  2. I agree! It’s very rarely discussed. The shame and isolation are so real. We need to be talking about it more to remove all of those stigmas!


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here