Today is the Day :: Overcoming My Biggest Mom Guilt Moments

Today is the Day!

Lately, I have been having a hard time sleeping.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m EXHAUSTED…but I have had a lot of guilt wondering if I was the best person I could be today.  I know, I know it’s hard to always be the best…but that’s our goal, right?  As I lay in bed, watching tv, scrolling on my phone, I tell my self,

Tomorrow is a new day and I will do better—for my kids, husband and myself.

Are we putting too much pressure on ourselves with looking at perfect family pictures on social media wondering why that can’t be us?  I find I’m looking at these pictures as my family is right in front of me—that’s one of my top problems.  I need to put the phone down and be more present.  I have tried to put my phone away when we get home from school/work—but somehow is ends up right back with me, probably for a photo op moment.  Today is the day I am going to stop putting so much pressure on myself and I know putting down the phone and being more present will absolutely help with that guilt. There is a new feature on the iPhone that allows social media limit and it has made me decrease my time on it!

Then there is the television.  After a full day of work and the kids at school, all we want to do is come home and cuddle.  But what about all these toys and activities that we just got for Hanukkah, shouldn’t we be playing with those? What’s a few more hours of the day keeping busy and doing fun activities.  Now I’m not saying let’s not watch TV, but my eyes definitely become crossed after a while—plus with 29372937 choices of shows, we spend most of the time just trying to find one show we all can agree on. Today is the day we are going to not sit on the couch or cuddle in bed for the whole time we are at home—we are going to be more active with our toys, activities and build forts!

This isn’t just about kids—it’s about connecting with your husband/wife/significant other too.  Just like when our kids are asleep and we miss them like crazy, that also happens when my husband falls asleep too.  Did we talk enough today? Did we even kiss hello and goodbye? Life gets so crazy and sometimes we forget about the ones we started this crazy journey with. We are lucky enough to get date nights out almost once a week, but what about the daily habit of checking in with each other, asking about each other’s day.  We have started teaching our kids to ask each other and us how our day was at dinner—but maybe we also need to be reminded.  Today is the day we will make an effort to kiss, talk and to make each other more of a priority.

Lastly, what about me? We are so busy making sure everyone else is okay but forget to check in on ourselves.  If you can’t tell already, I have a little anxiety about making sure the ones I love are taken care of and okay.  Because of this anxiety, I have been a nail-biter my whole life.  The last few weeks I have taken it upon myself to get a manicure once a week to not only help my nails grow out (on my tiny hands), but to give myself a little time to debrief and just sit. Though, I did take my daughter last week and it was super cute.  I also make sure to make time for friends and to have a regular girl’s dinner.  I need that and I am lucky that my husband is all about it too! My big challenge is finding time to work out—and eating right. I need something where it’s on my time but doesn’t cost $$$. Today is the day I’m going to research and begin taking care of my body—this holiday weight isn’t going to come off itself!

So there you have it. Today is the day I’m going to do all of these things! Now—I’m not saying this needs to be a resolution, and I’m not saying I need to do it all at once, but hopefully over the next few months I can be where I don’t feel guilty for not being there for the people I love, the way I know how to be.